If they get in the way I just shoot 'em down. I see red. I fire away and worry about it later.

Yeah... It's later that I see blue.

Like, I'm only 10 but I fall in love about once a week. Obviously I fall out of love just as quick. Except with a certain person who I will love until I die, even though she's--what's the word?--unobtainbable.


To take my mind off it I practise martial arts. Kevin says that ought to be marital arts, but I'm not quite sure what he's talking about. Except that it makes me mad and I want to hit him.

But I can't because although Kevin's got a brain the size of a planet he doesn't have a body to match. I mean, he would look normal if you saw him in a photograph but when you see him move you realise he's helpless. Like a flamingo with a computer bolted on where his head ought to be.

Kevin's alright, I suppose. In fact, he's almost a friend. Yeah... Occasionally he tries to be nice and I think he'll make a good friend. Then he says something smart that I don't understand and I think he's criticising me behind my back, so to speak.

It really pisses me off that I don't understand everything that's going on.

Though I am better than Kevin--and probably everyone else I know--at computer games. My reflexes are so fast and my brain just does it so easily.

It must be all the kung fu stuff I practise every night when it's time to go to bed. It makes a bit of a mess of the bedroom but I feel real calm after and sleep well.

If I'm by myself, that is, because often my best friend stays over at our place (or vice versa) and he snores.

I'm talking about Max. We are as close as...

Ms Rubenach told me what the word was... Symbiotic.

Yeah... you could say my relationship with Max was symbiotic--you know, like pilot fish on a whale shark or bacteria in your gut. You need them to get around (or digest your food or whatever) and they need you to be their host. They couldn't live without you.

Well, that's what it's like with Max and me. Max is the parasite and I'm the host. He spends half his life at my place, even sleeping in my bed sometimes. He always gets too hot. I try to kick him out but once he's asleep he can't be woken. Even when I insert foreign objects up his nostrils. Soft things, of course, like one of Andrea's cigarettes--or Max's little finger. (I took a photograph of him like that, once, asleep in my bed with his finger up his nose. I put it on the class notice board with a caption: In search of ??).

So in the end I have to get out of my own bed and sleep on the floor because I can't stand the heat.

My dad says: 'If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.'

But I need Max because he gives me so much to think about and so much to do. Although he's nearly two years younger than me he seems to think on the same level. Not that I'm dumb. It's just that he's smart. Very smart. Though you mightn't think so to look at him.

I mean, his mouth hangs open so much he often dribbles. Max says it's because his mouth is too big for his face. He should really say his lips are too big. I've seen inside his mouth and it's fairly normal. But his lips hang on his face like two pieces of rubber glued on by a mad inventor. And they're always wobbling and twitching like they're controlled by a computer that isn't programmed properly.

Maybe Max isn't programmed properly. That would explain why he does things you never expect.