Dear unhappy person...

If you are a child in a family like this then you may not be able to improve things for everyone all by yourself. But there are a few things you can do to make your own life happier. Which things work will depend on your particular circumstances. And how determined you are to be happy.

First of all, remember that your happiness doesn't depend on other people. It depends on you. Even if other people need to blame and argue all the time, you can choose not to. This will be difficult at first but it can be done!

How do you do this? To start with, two little tricks will help:

Trick number 1

Trick number 2

But remember...

You are not responsible for how other people behave or for what they think or feel or say.

So far, I have suggested things you can do all by yourself. The next stage is to involve other people by talking about your feelings.

The last thing to do is to make sure that you have a happy life, free from arguments, outside your family. Make sure your friends at school are the type that don't blame and argue. And don't you do it to them.

I wish you well in trying these ideas. It won't be easy, but if only one of them works, you will still be happier and better off than you are now.

Please write to me again, if you need further help.

Yours sincerely 

Virginia R. Claire

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